Self Love & Becoming a pro
14 Jun 2012
I have been on an incredible journey. I stepped on stage at the NPC Atlantic in 2009, 23 years old, oblivious to the “game”. Getting on stage was such a big deal for me. Here’s why
1. I was in a Figure suit (bikini)
2. I am a tomboy (I grew up playing in creeks and going to cow sales )
3. I didn’t have a coach
4. Previously, I had failed at most things making me feel like I wasn’t good enough
Everyone said aww she is so small, she needs more size. Heck, my only goal was to not come in last! The promoter sent out the post show email and my picture was on front of the advertisement! I looked at that as my trophy. After my next year of bad health (I will get into that on another note) I tried my best to add size and register for another show, THIS time in hopes of doing the NPC bikini division. I never gave it my all prepping for shows…I would have some beers, eat how and what I wanted (I was never fully committed) . I was sitting at Moes restaurant lol and had a break down because I just didn’t feel like I was GOOD ENOUGH. My show was in two weeks and I had just returned from a cruise. To sum everything up, I did two bikini shows and was very disappointed and let down. Did I deserve to win? HECK NO My last bikini show the GA , I was already defeated by negative energy and by the time I was on stage IT SHOWED.. I was not confident; I compared myself to the “other” girls. I WAS NOT CENTERED (being my original self). Honestly during that period I wasn’t in touch my original self at all.. it had been covered in slime and grime from years of pain, abandonment, self hate, doubt and fear. This past year I said to myself.. I know what I want… I want to be on the cover of Oxygen, inspire others, teach, get paid for what I LOVE! And be a WBFF fitness pro. SO I set my sights on the Kansas City Central Championships. The winner of each class could obtain pro status which would be a huge step to getting on the cover of Oxygen. So I worked hard and put money towards it day by day. I went all out this time, had a professional suit made and full on 12 week prep! During this time I did Reiki (energetic healing) it is known as spiritually guided life force energy. And boy is it painful!!! Emotionally painful. I learned so much about The CASEY that I been so out of touch with. The old pains, self doubt and fears came up and I had to deal with them. It was like beating emotional cancer. I started mediating every day, visualizing everything I wanted. I visualized accepting the win and nothing else. (If the mind can conceive it you can achieve it) REMEMBER THAT. I worked like my life depended on it. NO distractions, If someone or something was distracting me, I removed it from my life. I started LOVING MYSELF, Loving myself like I did as a child. I became more creative and happy. I did exercises like telling myself ( I love you in the mirror) it sounds silly but It works. Everything worked out perfectly leading up to the show, I got to meet pros in the industry that I look up to. Everyone was very kind. Lots of smiles! There were so many beautiful girls with amazing physiques. I knew right away that I couldn’t start comparing myself to them, that I needed to stay centered and focus on myself. The day of the show I was more nervous than I have ever been (on the inside)!! It was a mixture of excitement and nerves. When I was on stage my lips were actually quivering haha. I walked a little fast but I nailed the routine. What an adrenaline rush. I was in top callouts so I knew that was a good sign. Going back to room I watched the video that my husband filmed over and over. I had to turn it off because the cancerous thoughts started to surface. I had to get back to being present FAST. The night show was a blast. It was the big moment I had been waiting for. When they didn’t call my name after announcing 2nd place I didn’t know if I was in first or last. All I know is that I knew what it felt like to win because I had visualized it 6 weeks before the moment the MC announced CASEY SHIPP is our new WBFF PRO!!! I lost it! I went off stage crying like a baby. I was so grateful to have competed with such amazing girls. The judges had tough decisions to make. Now that I am representing the WBFF I want to give back! I want to meet my other goals from above, inspire and teach. Thank you to everyone who was truly happy for me. I will NOT let you down!
Too many people are not happy with themselves and knowing what you want out of life and knowing your purpose is a great way to start the self love and fulfillment process. When you love yourself ,your inner light shines so bright. Your vibrations are so high. ANYTHING is possible at that point. When you go for what you truly know makes you happy, doors will open! My note is SELF LOVE! Be the love that you seek. No one can do this for you. You can’t depend on anyone to make YOU feel a certain way. It is all about you. As we grow older, most people..most* grow more and more insecure. You start looking at your life and wondering, am I on the right track? I shouldn’t have made that decision, why does my friends have more money than me?, I wish, I wish , I wish. All of that doubtful thinking is self destructive. If you do not like where you are in life…start TODAY and write down what you do want and what will make you happy. Read it every day and be thankful as if you already have it. The more you stay in a state of gratitude the more you are open to receive. Stay Centered and know your worth. Everyone has a genius inside them… you just have to be open to listen.
Peace-Love- and kick ass today J xo